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Parenting Primer: Time

Written by sarah pollak

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Posted on December 21 2017

There is a saying, "Time is on your side", and the Stones sang "Time is on My Side" but, seriously?! Whoever said that did not have children. 

And time has changed.  These things were said before Pokemon, before Twitter, before Instagram, before Facebook, before Pinterest, before email! You know, in the dark ages.

How Time has Changed

Now added to parenting; places to post pictures; emails to respond to; pins to find tonight's maybe-dinner before you just order dinner and look for vacation spots quickly, so you have time to go back and check all those parenting blogs to make sure that you're parenting alright (hopefully after day 2 you gave up on "right")....oh, and hold on, the kids want some time.  Riiiiight. 

I just bought a car.  The pile on the right is the manuals.  On the left, the "getting to know your new car" pamphlet. I might read the pamphlet. Maybe. I already have a license, and insurance, and credit, so, they're not really worried. 

 Where's the Manual for this thing?!

No one has time for the manuals.  The same with parenting.  If you read every book and blog you'll be overwhelmed.  Not a good thing.  Keep your eyes on the road/the baby. You'll do fine.

The manual/books/blogs are there if you need them. Seriously. If you feel too terrified, sad, scared, depressed- hire a professional. There's no shame in that if it's in the budget, if it's not in the budget, there are hotlines and services, no shame in that either.  The experts have time to read the manuals!

A Word on Doing it Right

You're doing it right.  Perfectly?  No.  Right?  Yes.. First baby?  You've never done it before, and it's really important, you want to make sure that you read the manual for the right year's model. But. They are all different.  Which is wonderful, but means that there is no manual. You have to read a little here and a little there and then look at your baby and talk to friends and family and do what feels right to you. 

And.  You will make mistakes.

You will start to go down that one way street the wrong way, you'll run that "yellow" light. Good odds that that beloved bundle will roll off something-a bed, a chair, your lap, a changing table, a stair.  Completely unscientific survey?  Most do.  You and baby will be fine.  The odds are with you.

Time is Relative

And time? Time is on your side.  Let the urgent things slip slide away.  Focus on the important.  Enjoy the next fifteen minutes.  If it feels okay, try the next fifteen. Whatever feels okay to you, take the time when you can.  You don't get that new car smell back, or that top of baby's head smell either.

There used to be, written in cement, at the corner of Clayton and Fell in San Francisco "Time is Money. Save Some Today".  I don't live over there any longer.  I often wonder if it's still there.  I have't had time to look.  That's okay.  It's not that important.  I'll save that time for something else.  It's a choice:)

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